Tale No. 1

 a friend of mine told me that he just got divorced. i was shocked. okay, only a bit. they were married a good 3 years. but he told me that it was mutual. both sides decided that it was for the better. he said they were compatible, yes.. but the love just wasnt there.

i was like, hello? i really thot they were in love long before that. not too long, maybe 2 or 3 years but i guess that period was enuff for a couple to get to know each other before deciding to tie the knot. nway, he said that they maintain the friendship, and in fact their relationship now is much better than when they were married. so, maybe they are better off being ‘just friends’.

his tears were rolling down as he pronounced the divorce, witnessed by family and the judge. and so did hers. but he was feeling relieved at the same time.

to me, not being in love is just an excuse. love alone shouldnt be the foundation of a marriage. a marriage can still survive out of trust, respect and care for each other. most of all, out of honouring the solemnisation that was done.

what is love anyway? is it lust, or romance? or simply the feeling of missing someone when he/she is not around?

whatever love is, once u are married, u must learn to love. it’s the same as ur family. u dont get to choose ur parents nor ur siblings. they’re just who they are. and u love them cos they’re family.

a spouse is a lot more. the person whom u share ur life with. done everything with. and the one u should feel closest to.

to me, my husband is everything. of cos it takes some time to learn about each other. u learn the do’s and dont’s. u learn the likes and dislikes. and u are willing to learn bcos u want to make the most out of it. u know that this is the person u’re gonna spend the rest of ur life with.  

so, to me a divorce shouldnt happen just bcos u ‘fall out of love’. cherish it. it can be done. whether u want it or not.

Tale No. 2

we were watching tv after dinner last friday. it was already 11 sthing. too sleepy but too full, so we couldnt sleep. in the beginning, we watched this malay story for the sake of watching. but as the story unfolds, it began to attract our attentions. so we end up sleeping at 1 pm to wait for the ending.

samad is a filial son. he was married to his mom’s anak angkat, zu, whom his mom took from the orphanage and took care of. so, zu is very much indebted to samad’s mom, mak limah.

they have a 17-yr ol’ daughter, fatihah (i was shocked to see eizlan and eja as parents of a 17-yr ol!! they’re not that ol, are they??). they were living happily ever after until samad’s pet-sis came to live with them. su, is a medic graduate waiting for posting, her parents just passed away, so that made her an orphan as well. (why lar this samad must take another pet sis??).

zu was happy that su is around cos she always came back late, so su cooks for the family (including samad la). at the same time su always go see mak limah to take care of the ol’ lady.

fatihah’s friend had warned her about su, cos her own father had divorced her mom to marry a ’sweet and nice’ lady just like su.. bcos that is the quality men always fall for.

then zu was diagnosed with chronic kidney condition. so zu always had to go for haemo dialysis ( u see coops, that’s how i knew hehe…) but then, this samad, instead of accompanying zu to hospital, he went to visit his mom, bringing along su, on his mom’s request!! u see, mak limah, being lonely and old, has also fallen for su’s kindness of taking care of her. zu is sick so she couldnt be there for mak limah that much as she used to.

mak limah has been observing how su looked at samad and she herself is beginning to love su as her own child, so she wishes for su to be her daughter-in-law. and since her only son is samad, she asked samad to marry su.

this samad, like ‘a sleepy person given a pillow’ said, kalau itu yang boleh membuat mak bahagia, saya akan mengikut kehendak mak‘. (duh!!! stupid guy!! i am so marah!!) tapi macamana dengan zu?

takpe, itu kau jangan risau. zu tu baik orangnya, biar mak uruskan. (this mak limah is so hampeh!!). so, mak limah asks zu. zu requested for a few days to think it over. zu wanted to ask samad about it but he pretends like nothing happened and avoids any conversation with zu. then one day, samad brought su home (during this time su has moved out from their house). then zu went berserk. she was so upset (of course la!!) at su and samad. yet, she just couldnt say NO to mak limah.

and when fatihah knows, all hell broke loose! she blames her mother for being so weak, she blames her grandma for being so selfish and blames her father for being so ignorant of her mother’s feeling. she ran away from home, fainted and was warded.

by this time, the solemnisation between samad and su had taken place. when they were about to start their agenda, suddenly samad got a phonecall about fatihah. so they all went to the hospital.

b4 that, mak limah visited zu at home, asking her why she didnt attend the majlis (this mak limah is so damn insensitive). and when zu went to the kitchen, mak limah accidentally read zu’s diary, which is full of her anger towards mak limah. when zu saw mak limah reading it, she blurted everything out, saying that mak limah could only sense su’s feeling but totally insensitive towards zu’s.

in the hospital, su cried and said, kalau su tahu nak jadi macam ni, su tak kahwin dengan abang samad, maafkan su kak. biarlah abang samad lepaskan su. su minta maaf. (ello!! it’s already too late). but then zu said, never mindla, they continue la. she is willing to accept this fate as a test for her.

okay, end of tales. the point is, marriage is no bed of roses. when urs is being tested, it is ur decision whether to carry on or end it. what makes us a better person is when we can deal with situations with patience and accept it.

will be digging up for some more juicy stories…hehe..